To start, I’d just like to address how weird it feels to submit a blog post to a teacher. The writing here is so much more informal and personal compared to the writing on any other assignment. I talk on this blog in a way I’d probably never talk in front of a teacher, though that’s mostly because I’m too awkward when I can’t organize, edit, and straight up delete my thoughts like I can online. Plus I’m already used to sharing my thoughts and feelings online, so this just feels natural to me.
Yesterday I pitched my project to my teacher and it took a while after to calm down. My mouth was really strangely dry and all I wanted to do was make myself as unnoticeable as possible. But I’m glad now I have that and the after-school pitch/gallery walk out of the way, so now it’s all just writing until the oh so dreaded “Ted Talk.”
I should probably talk about the after school part, too. It was ok. I mean at first it was weird cause some people had their family there taking pictures by their boards and I was just standing there like… “ok.” It took about 30 minutes for someone to finally come ask a question, and after that I got a few people. Though the only question most people asked me was “What’s the story about?” which I get, but it got boring just repeating the same answer over and over, especially since it’s just about the only thing I said. I felt like a scratched record, just repeating the same thing like 5 times. I really appreciated the people who stopped by and recommended a book or talked about their own book-writing projects though.
The last thing I really feel the need to talk about is the actual writing. I’m gonna start tonight, which I’m looking forward to. I want to write during my lab time in school too, but I really don’t like writing where people can peek at my screen and read it. It’s weird but it makes me uncomfortable. I might just start bringing my computer to school and find a more private hidden place to write, or just look for an empty corner in the labs. Its distracting when I feel like people are reading while I’m writing and makes it hard to find that kind of “flow.” I’ll just have to deal with it as it happens, I guess. I hope I have enough to talk about here after this.
I plan to finally begin writing before Monday, which I’m really excited for, but also strangely nervous. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before, bue one of the reasons I’m so nervous is because if I don’t write then I don’t have to face whether I’m any good or not. Of course I want to be, but there’s a difference between the writer in my head and when I actually write. That’s also why I’m only doing the first draft, though, because like I said it’s not expected to be the next Gatsby or Fault in Our Stars.
But I’ve talked enough about that. Right now I want to write out my nerves about the pitch. I seriously doubt there are many people reading this who don’t know what I’m talking about, but should you need an explanation: the pitch is where we put together a tri-fold poster board (yes, the science fair kind) and stand around with it after school in the cafeteria and answer questions from too many people that you don’t know. I expect it to be just as fun as it sounds. It is better than what I thought it would be though. When I first heard about it I freaked out and actually thought about just skipping out on the assignment, since I thought we’d all take turns getting up and talking in front of everyone. Then I found out that all I had to was stand around and only maybe talk to people (and of course that it’d be worth 100 points). So I figured it wouldn’t be that bad.
The second (or first, I should say,) is to pitch it to your teacher, which I’m really not looking forward to since I get the feeling you’re supposed be able to talk about your project for more that 30 seconds. I mean what am I supposed to talk about? All I can think to say is “Uhh yeah so I’m gonna write a book?” Even then it’s not even a book, it’s just the first draft of one. I mean I guess I could talk about that, too. Do I mention the story? The characters? How do I do that when I haven’t even found the right way to explain it to myself out loud? It might sound weird but when I write it’s I’m just describing things I see play out in my head, and it’s all just a feeling i’m pulling the words from. Like you know how it looks in the Harry Potter movies when they pull out memories from their heads and put it into that cauldron thing in Dumbledore’s office? It kind of feels like that. Like that feeling is flowing from my fingers through the keyboard and onto the page. Like I can feel the words popping out of thin air like the letters do behind the blinking cursor. How do I explain that to a bunch of random people asking me questions?
Now that I read it back it sounds really stupid, but that’s the best way I can think to describe it. But I do feel better after writing it, so I don’t think I want to delete it. I mean writing it all has given me a few ideas of what I can talk about. What I love about writing, why it’s just the first draft, how it feels to write? I don’t know.
What I do know is that this blog post is almost a week overdue and it’s already way too long, so I’m gonna cut it short here. I’m out.
With the 20% Project, I am required to choose a goal of my choice to complete by January, 2016 and spend 20% of my class time working on it. My goal is one I’ve always wanted to do but until now, couldn’t work up the motivation for: writing the first draft of a book.
I’ve written short stories before, most only being a page or two in length, the longest consisting of 7 parts and an epilogue, all of which were 3-7 pages in length. I also had a plan to write a sequel series, but the idea sort of fell through. Ever since I’ve loved writing, but every idea I had I would plan out for ages but never get around to writing very much. With this I expect the pressure of having to reach a certain goal before a certain date will inspire me to put my fingers to the keys a lot more.
As part of the project, I’m required to have an implementation plan, which doesn’t really consist of much. The majority of my plan is writing and editing, the only other things I’d need to do are getting a better idea of who my characters are and a little story outlining. After that all I do is write, write, and write some more with a little editing and re-reading sprinkled in.
When I found out I could use this as my goal for this project, I was ecstatic. Like I said previously, I love writing but could barely bring myself to actually write anything at all. My first thought was that this would end up being my most memorable and favorite assignment from high school. I mean I’ve had one other assignment like this, but it was still too limiting, so I’m extremely excited for this.
All that’s left to say is I should be ready to begin outlining the story next week, and if I’m fast enough begin writing the same week or the week after.